Written 4 December 2018
At the bottom of Loch Lomond lives an octopus.
He doesn't know how he got there, why he's the only octopus in the loch or, indeed, how he was surviving in freshwater.
He did, however, enjoy the peace and quiet. And the longer he stayed there, the less he thought about such profoundly massive questions.
And when a younger, more agile Octopus arrived to replace him, he found the company annoying almost instantaneously.